Home Stretch

Well, it's finally here. We leave for Chicago tomorrow morning to catch our plane to China tomorrow afternoon! It feels like we should have a lot more to do to actually get ready to make such a big trip, but everything is pretty much done. We managed to get the majority of our packing done last night. All we have left is to throw in the last minute essential stuff. Of course I didn't get to clean the house from top to bottom exactly like I wanted to, but oh well, it will still be here waiting to be cleaned when I get home. The dishes and laundry are done at least, and the fridge is empty so we don't have to worry about growing anything weird while we are gone:-)
So today the big thing on our list is going to the bank. The big thing on my list is getting a massage! I know I really need to relax.
The crazy thing is, that in spite of the place we are actually standing today - I am still facing the monster of fear and doubt. Until going through this whole process I never really understood how deep my fear and mistrust of God ran and still runs. Even after all of the love and good things God has shown us along this journey I am still afraid that He is going to leave me hanging at the last minute - that He won't keep His promises - that He doesn't love me. My brain knows that none of those things are true - I know that God is faithful and true and He keeps every promise. I know that He loves me so much that He sent His only son to die on the cross for me. Mostly, I can't get my head around that kind of love, and all I know is I certainly haven't earned it and don't deserve it.
So the truth be told, I am a little shaky and fragile today, but pointing out the monster is half the battle in overcoming it. I am determined to let go of the reins because God is not going to steer us wrong now. God called us to this very day over four years ago and His word says it best:

1 Thessalonians 5:24
"The one who calls you is faithful and he will do it."

Stay tuned! Hopefully the next update we make is from the other side of the world!!!:-)

Jennifer